both hands
because it takes both hands to do it right, baby


June 16, 2004
How hard is it to make cookies? Not hard. Not hard at all. Especially when youíre getting PAID to make cookies, because it is part of your JOB. However, some people seem to think that they are exempt from making cookies each day. I am here and now telling those people that they are WRONG.

Today, like most days, I planned my meals to fit within my evil Weight Watcherís Points plan. I am very careful because I want to eat lots and lots of movie theater popcorn on the weekends. Each week must be carefully plotted to allow for movie popcorn. Within my planning, there is room for a cookie with my lunch. A particular cookie I purchase each day at the Cafť located inside Bobís Hogs and Weiner Pigs (for those of you who think itís odd to have a cafť inside Bobís Hogsóeveryone need their espresso and Chai, OK?). However today, there were NO COOKIES.


Itís not that they were out of cookies. Itís that they hadnít made any. There was cookie dough in the refrigerator waiting to become cookies. But there were NO COOKIES. I asked the girl behind the counter if she would be making cookies today. She called down to the other girl behind the counter, ďAre we making cookies today?Ē Other girl responded by saying that she didnít know. Didnít know? What the hell kind of answer is that?! Are you going to shirk your cookie-making duties for the entire day?

So I ended up with pear chips instead. Which are OK. But pear chips are NOT cookies.

I thought about the lack of cookies and the evil girls behind the counter as I walked back to my desk. Why would they not make cookies today? Itís not as though cookie making was an optional part of their day. It was part of their job each morning. How can you just skip that part?

What if I started skipping parts of my job? How about if I decide not to use the phone for a day? Or even an hour? What kind of uproar would that cause? What if I boycotted computer use? How much money would we lose? Maybe I should just begin informing my customers that certain services I usually offer were not available today, or tomorrow, or on other random days I chose not to offer them?

As I ranted on and on about cookies, I realized I was beginning to sound slightly crazy (or more than slightly crazy, depending on how well you know me). Apparently, thatís what happens when a person is only allotted a limited amount of food each day. When your selection is small, the selections you make take on a much greater meaning.

Since Iím sitting here typing my story, itís obvious I survived my cookie-free day. Maybe I should try to go cookie-free more often. Just as long as I still get to eat my Carmel Hersheyís Kisses. Letís not get crazy, people.

8:54 p.m. :: 1 comments so far ::
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